When you look back at your past situations or things that have happend you can look back it either in a light of how awful it was or how God molded and shaped you during the process. There is alot we can do in our victories, we can grow from our hardships and look back and know if you never went through that paticular hard time you wouldnt be who you are or handle things the way you do now.
I have some thing's ive been thinking about lately in the light of what God had done and how He took care of me, and always does take care of me even when i'm feeling so overwhelmed and feel like there isnt a end to the road.
When I found out I was pregnant with Owen in Jan of 2009, we were overjoyed. Of course within 5 weeks of being pregnant I started feeling the sickness quite badly of being pregnant that alot of women deal with, some do more then others and some do more then me, which at the time I couldnt amagine anyone feeling any worse then I did, from 5 weeks until 16 or 17 weeks I felt so sick, nausious, horrible heartburn, throwing up constantly and feeling like I had hard core flu badly. I had my first apt at my dr office and was pretty much lookin and feeling so GREEN. I had not ate good for days, couldnt keep fluids down. Some ladies told me zofran was a good anti nausia medication I could possibly take. I was gonna talk about it to the dr that day. They were going through all the paper work and info with me and mike as I felt so sick I couldnt think. Eventully the nurse was like, you dont look good, you ok? I said no, I feel so sick.
The dr came in and said I needed to go to the hospital and get checked because she felt I was probably very dyhrated. Which once we got to troy beaumont emergancy they got me hooked up with a iv and fluids and zofran through the iv, wow, what a feelin that was when the zofran was flowing through my veins, it took that awful nausia down quite a bit.
They had me there a very long time, they couldnt get my key levels up, and at this time being 5 weeks pregnant, they were very concerned at how DYHRATED I was. They just kept pumping tons of fluids in me. I think we got there at 12 pm and didnt leave until 10pm, it was along time. I forget the times. The dr was saying ive gotta keep myself from getting that bad again, so I started doing better about drinking and eating enough so I didnt get myself that bad again.
I for along time just felt so tired, still pretty nausious alot even with zofran. Went to fly to see my grandparents in the middle of feb in alabama, I felt bad because pretty much my whole time there I was sick, throwing up, and misrable. I basically stayed inside and just watched old westerns with them, and talked and just rested. But we still had a good time together amist it all.
By mothers day, which I was about 18 weeks preg by that point and feeling way better then I was. We went to drive to liberty university to see Kelly graduate. We had a pretty good drive there. And kelly had fun talking to my belly. And on mothers day, it was so special, was sitting in the church connected with liberty university, all the sudden during the sermon, I felt Owen move for the first time, it was amazing!!!! And from that day on I felt him and it was truely breath taking new exsperience for me.
At 20 weeks we were scheduled for the ultra sound to find out if we were having a boy or a girl. And we were so excited. Mike of course was saying it was a he from the very start, haha! We were in the room and she's like you want to know the sex right? We were like, oh yes, we do. She's like it's a BOY and mikes face just lit up, it was so sweet. Of course I was excited too. Then she was lookin around and confirming things to make sure all looked good. She's like, do you know you have a cyst the size of a cantelope???? And we were like, uhh no..so it was a big deal, it was so big and they were very concerned. So we got scheduled to meet with a high risk dr at royal oak beaumont hospital asap. We met with him and he said we needed to have surgery to remove it asap, and he told us the process in which he'd go about doing it, etc. It would be a high risk surgery, concerns were not putting me into labor, messing with the uterus is very touchy, and it can send you into labor if your not careful. They just wanted it out asap!
So, we had got scheduled for the surgery that wen, and it was earlier in the morning. I remember feeling not enough time to prepare myself and was so overwhelmed, and just prayed, I just wanted everything to be good and Owen to be safe and things to go smoothly. We got there, got all things situated with paper work. Pastor Cliff came in and prayed along with John rigg in the waiting room with us. Then they brought me back to get prepared for surgery.
Oh the wonders of hospitals, cold, scary and I was tryin to pray for calmness, which God gave me. I was trying to remain calm. I had never had any kind of surgery, had no idea what to exspect. Got prepped. They did a ultra sound, and as soon as I got done seeing my little sweet o bear on ultra sound which brought joy to my heart and a smile on my face. Mike & his mom and Pastor Jim came in my side of the curtian. I was suprised but it was nice to know my Pastor cared enough to pray with us . I was so scared and my stomach was in knots, not only because of surgery but because I didnt eat for awhile and for me even later in my pregnancy, I needed to eat or it made me sick.
But God really calmed my stomach, and after Pastor prayed and left they rolled me into surgery. I just remember them situating me on my back, tilted to one side with a blanket or pillow on my side so I wasnt flat flat on my back and then them putting a mask on and asking me to squeeze something then I went from that to waking up in a room, someone over me. Katie reed, she is a dr there and she told mike she'd keep a eye on me for him. Since the surgery was 2 hours and I was in recovery for three. She said something to me right after I was rolled out of surgery, and I remember waking up for a few with her saying, everything went okay, everything's gonna be okay. I just remember saying it really hurts or something then falling back asleep. They were giving me quite a few of safe pain medications.
I then woke up more and this was after 3 hours of being in recovery, I still felt so spaced out but was more alert. I was in so much pain by this point. I felt so overwhelmed and worried about my owen..They took me into another room and wanted to move me from one bed to the next. I thought I was gonna die, I was in so much pain and them moving me was like the worst pain ever, I just remember little, but I do remember bursting into tears and not intenionally, just was so overwhelmed, they finally got me on to the other table and were tryin to move me carefully to try and hear Owens heartbeat, and see him via ultra sound. Mike and mike's mom Donna were there. And mike was trying to calm me down, what a good husband, I was so worried, but it was the drugs that were messing my thinking clearly I would amagine. Finally after a long time of moving me around tryin to avoid my 4 spots where they had to go in, so those spots were so sore, so thats why it took them awhile to find his heartbeat, etc.
Finally got me situated and got me something to drink, and gave me pain meds and kept me there another 3 hours I think, they wanted to wait for a few things before they could let me go home. Cant remember what that was. But, i had a few things to eat, I lost my desire to eat, nothing sounded good. We finally got home. I just remember sitting in the one comfy chair for a week, couldnt move, anytime I had to get up it hurt beyond imagination. And Owen started moving alot, and it was like the worst when he'd kick or move because I was so sore inside.
One of Mike's tech guys made us a meal, which was sweet. And my Aunt Sue (harrington) brought me flowers and a card. That was also so sweet.
Then we moved a week or less after all this and so I wasnt able to do much at all. It was a blessing in its own way. But I had blessings, and people who blessed me so. Joy Dockham came and helped me clean the house, and dust, and helped me alot that day we moved. She was a huge blessing to me.
After all this God really taught me alot and the blessing that He took care of us during this whole process and took care of Owen was so amazing. The fact that He know's what He's doing in everything He does. What a blessing! God is BIG God ....
Thanks for reading. Sorry it's so much, hopefully it didnt bore you. But encourage you in some way. Now, Owen is 9 month's and such a blessing to our life!